Waiting for something to happen...

I am sitting here, waiting for something to happen...
a fit angry one of my Christmas lights has a few broken bulbs and refuses to work. It is one of those long, 100 led, string.  The stupid music box works though and it only makes me angrier. I do not know where I put my spare bulbs. Cannot find them anywhere. I suppose I will have to buy a new whole set and hope it has spares that I can use for the old one.
I am not excited about Christmas at all but that does not mean I will not decorate. I do this once a year and I refuse to let anything stop me. Especially the fact that there is no snow, the temperatures are above 0 and the sun shines like it's April. nothing wrong with that, I love April. In April, not in December.
I am more excited about going to the dentist tomorrow. I mean, it is a necessity and I do not see why people are so afraid to go.
I am a lot more excited for my Amaryllis papillio. It has two flower stems. Never had one like that before. I suppose it will bloom in January. Anytime is good. It will be a thing of beauty.
I am more excited about going to sleep in the next five minutes (not gonna happen, though) than about Christmas.
The good news is that I managed to write 8 pages of my third novel the other day. It is a lot considering I allowed reality to  rule my mind and neglected the best part of myself: my mind. Especially the part that holds an entire imaginary world. How did that happen? Why was I so careless with my own sanity?
It is one of the reasons I do not enjoy things the way other people do. because I am not whole most of the times and things just don't stick to me. Like water and oil. Never gonna see them blend into each other.
Why do we allow the bad things in our lives take over? It makes no sense.
I am very much aware of this and that is why, just before I started writing this, I went outside and gave some of my Muscovy ducks a big, big hug. Then looked at the sun with no thought in my head, then took a few pictures of the amaryllis stems for posterity. All I had in my brain was what I was looking at.  And it felt good. Then, as if by divine touch, I had an idea about my book and stored it in that special part of my brain.
The sun is still up. A chainsaw is being abused somewhere in the neighborhood. People cutting trees for fire. It is a good day for work.
I imagine that in more than one place in the village people are butchering pigs. For some reason, pigs are sacrificed for Christmas every year. the traditional date for doing that is on the 20th but they do it whenever they want. That is why I say December is a month of mourning for pigs. Just like Thanksgiving is for turkeys and Easter for lambs. Don't understand the connection between these animals and the holidays but I am in no position to judge. The important fact is that televisions have material for the traditional Christmas news. Or Easter. Or Thanksgiving. Or any other such holiday when everything happens according to a script that has been use over and over, and everyone is so amazed by everything even if they have seen the same thing every year.  I suppose it is just a human need, to do this things. They would suffer if anything in the script would change.
The children must be getting ready to go caroling. And by getting ready I mean they make plans about how to spend the money they may earn on meaningless things.
This is the world I live in. Do not get me wrong. I am sure there are some kids out there that co carolling because they like it, or because they believe it is the right thing to do, or because their parents told them so.  But the majority do it for the gain. If only they bothered to learn to carols properly.
Enough with negativity. We gain nothing from it.
More of these sunny, spring-like days and I will start thinking about how to plan my flower garden again. I am already waiting for  a firm to renew its bulb collection. I saw a few rare lilies I want to have. I know I have too many already for such a small space but I want more. They are too beautiful .
You see how easy I start thinking about garden planning? But no. I will not give in to it. Not yet. I must resist the urge because winter must pass first. There may not be any snow now but there will be, sooner or later. It always comes. I hope sooner rather than later because if the temperatures drop below 0 and there is no coating of snow my roses might freeze. (Oh my, I did it again. I can't finish a thought about weather without linking it to something about my plants.)
Enough with the break. Back to my book...